I did. Seriously. We were presenting collateral ideas to a client that happens to be an educational institution. I was trying to say "bachelor's and master's degrees" and instead I stumbled over the first two words and said "bastard degree".
My brain went kind of cloudy. I don't think I've ever said "bastard" before in my life and now I'd just said it in front of a client. What to do?? I could clearly hear the voice of my father in-law in my head: take it a step further. But how? Bastard isn't a normal part of my vocabulary. It didn't even "slip out." I just mumbled the perfect combination of words to result in me cussing. I honestly don't remember exactly what I said, but it was something to the effect of, "Did I just say 'bastard'?" Everyone agreed that I did and I went on reading the copy.
Later in the meeting there was another opportunity for me to slip "bastard" into the conversation while poking a bit of fun at myself, which I did.
I've now said used "bastard" seven times in this post. I think that oughtta do it for the next 28 years or so.
Photo courtesy of here.