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Friday, March 23, 2007

What would you ban?

So...'dja catch the Miss USA pageant? Me neither.

That's a lie. I saw part of it. It was the part where Miss Puerto Rico (or someone like that) was asked if she could ban one thing what would it be and why.

Instantly I think of alcohol, drugs or cigarettes. I hate smoking for a HUGE number of reasons, each of which I rehearse in my mind every day when I walk through a haze of smoke from the Insurance Dolls before entering the building. Someday I'm going to do something about that...

I would have settled on alcohol because, frankly, I hate drunk drivers and how abusive people can become when they drink too much. It's despicable and without excuse. (I'm sure Miss USA 2006 would disagree.)

Miss Honolulu's answer? Using a cell phone while driving. Or maybe it was shaving while driving. No, I'm pretty sure she decided on cell phones. "Because it's a distraction".

For some reason that seemed like a really, really stupid answer.

I listed three better answers already! Pollution, pornography, and multi-level marketing also come to mind.

Of course, French and Canadians should be banned and many people from Texas shouldn't be allowed to reproduce. Also, Corn Nuts, Ebonics and traditional car dealership radio spots. Staying at work past 5:00, littering and plumber's crack should get the ax too.

So there are a few things I'd ban. What would you ban?