My son is like an insurance company

Generally, all he says is, "no" and "more."


Of course, another way of saying it is that insurance companies behave like two year-olds.

Two weeks. Honestly?

Yeah, it's been a while. Whatever. I've been busy. What have I been busy with? Poop. That's what.

I forgot how much newborns poop. Want to venture a guess as to how often they poop?

Six times an hour. That's how often.

Want to venture a guess as to when they poop?

Usually around 3 am.*

Want to know when they fall asleep?

About 1 am.

Yeah. Anyhoo. Aside from being sleepy and all that I've been checking out the following cool things which I would highly recommend taking a look at:

• Google Wave - This could be a game-changer. This is the full demo. Watch the first 15 minutes then, if you want, jump here for the highlights.
  
• The new iPhone 3.0 software (unlocked and lovin' every minute of it!)
• Fake Steve Jobs is back with his iLiver 2.0. Brilliant.
• TweetDeck now (supposedly) syncs your followers and groups across multiple computers. Nice, but I still wish it was web-based.
  
• An awesome article in Wired about what the Big Three automakers need to do to survive (hint: On the Road to Recovery, Let the Little Guys Drive). A must-read.
  

So yeah. Check that stuff out and let me know what you think and I'll see if I can be a bit better about posting.

*My wife just pointed out that it's been a while since I was up at 3 am changing diapers. True. But I did do it, even if it was a while ago. The fact that I'm still exhausted by that singular event means you should feel sorry for me all the more.

Our girl arrived

Hey world. I'm here. It's been a week now since our little girl was born (everyone is healthy an well - things went about as smoothly as one could hope).

Needless to say (although I'll say it anyway), life has been turned upside down as we try and figure out sleeping schedules, keep a two year-old happy and wonder if it's normal for a newborn to go through six diapers an hour.

Then there's the projectile poop.

Thank heavens for supportive friends and family.

It's still a bit weird to hear myself say, "The kids" when for the last couple of years it's been, "The kid." Our little girl has some very similar features to our little boy, but she's definitely going to have her own look to her which we're excited about. She has very long, beautiful fingers.

Is this rambling? Incoherent? I'm running on very little sleep here (see third paragraph).

We are doing well. We're keeping a low-profile as we get adjusted to our new family member. But life is good. I'm blessed with a happy, healthy family, a job that provides for us (which I enjoy), the gospel and a beautiful wife of whom I am completely unworthy.

Time to wake the two year-old.

 Let the fun begin.

P.S. We went with Sara.

A family update

Someone pointed out that I haven't given a family update on here recently. Time to remedy that.

We have about, oh, three weeks before our little girl makes her grand appearance. We're still leaning toward Sara(h) but haven't decided on the "h" or a middle name. Suggestions are still welcome.

Work is good, although a bit of a downer: Yesterday one of my friends got laid off and everyone took a pay cut. While that certainly sucks, I'm grateful to still have a job and insurance - especially with the baby coming later this month.

Yeah. I think that's about it. Not much to report - just plugging away. Life is good.

(If you'd like me to be more specific about something, leave word in the comments.)

As a man, sometimes there is no correct answer

A few months ago my wife asked me whether or not she looked pregnant. (For the record, she was about five months along - due in May.)

My Man Radar kicked in immediately. I quickly thought about my options and decided that between saying a woman looked pregnant and saying she didn't look pregnant it would be better to go with the latter. Because, really, does a woman ever want to hear, "Honey, you look pregnant"? I doubted it. Feeling pretty good about my answer I responded, "Not at all!"

Wrong answer.

Despite my Man Radar calculations and the fact that, in my opinion, Amy was barely showing and as hot as ever this was the wrong thing to say.

"What? Seriously? Look at this!" She said as she stuck her stomach out as far as she could. "You don't think I look pregnant?"

"Uh...no," I backpedaled. "You look pregnant. Very pregnant! Nine months! Huge!"

I don't know if she saw the humor in my response because she changed the subject.


P.S. When I told my father in-law this story he just laughed at me.

Vote on how we should spell "Sara(h)"

We're considering naming our girl Sara(h). While this is by no means set in stone, it's how we're leaning at the moment.

The question is, should we spell "Sarah(h)" with or without the "h"? The poll is in the upper corner of the site. If you want to give any additional justification for your vote/further argue your case, do so in the comments.

And....go.

Idaho, it's a girl, and other updates from the last couple weeks

Sorry about the blogging drought. While I've been slacking in the blogging area, I've been more than picking up for it in all the other stuff I've got going on. Let me explain. No. There is too much. Let me sum up.

The Bun II

Most importantly, we're having a girl! We went to Fetal Foto last night (shudder) and had another ultrasound. It turns out the experience wasn't nearly as creepy as I thought it would be. And they sent us home with a DVD of the entire ultrasound set to music. So a bit cheesy perhaps, but not creepy.

Speaking Engagement

Last week I went and spoke at Brigham Young University Idaho on "social media and its impact on business and advertising". (Sounds boring doesn't it?) I was spending all my free time into the wee hours of the morning (literally) preparing the presentation. So no blogging for me.

Ironic since I was speaking on social media.

I presented a "one hour" version and a 15 minute version. I asked the students in the first presentation to fill out surveys afterward and overall the feedback was good.

My little family was able to come with me and the faculty members were very gracious hosts. Overall, I think it went pretty well and I really enjoyed hanging out for a bit up on my old stomping grounds.

If you're interested (or sadistic) you can view the Keynote slides by clicking the links in the sidebar. (Update: now removed. Email me if you want to see them.)

Brazil by way of Provo

Oh yeah. My sister in-law left for her mission to Brazil. Her visa didn't come through in time so instead of going straight to Brazil she had to make a slight detour to the Provo MTC. She just left today. Knowing that she'll be gone for 18 months doesn't seem like a HUGE deal until I think about it this way:

When she gets back my son will be twice as old as he is now.
Our little girl will be my son's age.

Crazy.

Txt me

Saturday we merged our cell phone plan with my in-law's. We now have more minutes and unlimited text messaging for less than we were paying before. Good deal.

As an aside, I had no idea how disciplined I was by limiting my texting to a paltry 1,000 messages per month. Being on an unlimited plan for a little over three days now I've already used over 300 texts. It feels good to not have to worry about that anymore.


TRANSITION...

Three random things I've noticed within the last two weeks:

1. We need more AA batteries in our place. I am at the point I'm pulling the rechargeable batteries out of the computer mouse to put in the remote to watch movies.

2. Singing multiple verses of "Old McDonad" is really funny when you start making up noises for non-barnyard animals. You should hear my bald eagle. Top notch.

3. If you see a house like this, and it's listed for $159,000, don't get your hopes up.

A week? Seriously?

Dag, yo. I didn't realize it's been a week since I last posted. I have three posts (or at least quick thoughts jotted down that have the potential to become posts) saved in draft form waiting for the time...well, I'm not sure exactly what they're waiting for aside from me to get the chance to work on them.

I've been busy.

I would tell you what I've been busy doing but I don't have time.

Today I got my new business cards. "Social media strategist." Additional title. New responsibilities. No raise. It's cool. I'm pretty stoked that I have a job.

I've been thinking quite a bit recently about how the world has changed a lot in a relatively short amount of time. Think about it. I remember very clearly when the Internet didn't exist (or at least it didn't exist outside of government and universities.) You probably do too.

Now think about how much of your life depends on it. The way we pay bills, the way we buy stuff, the way we communicate with each other, the way we bank, the way we find people, the way we work, the way we learn and discover new things and the fact that you're reading this right now. It's all the web. It's literally transformed our way of life in the span of around 15 years.

How many more 15 years do I have left in my lifetime? Probably a few. At least three I'd guess. Makes you wonder what's going to happen.

My mom said she thought it would have been fascinating to live when her grandmother did because she (her grandmother) went from riding a horse and buggy to seeing a man on the moon.

That really is remarkable.

But if I had to choose I'd rather have my laptop and the Internet and not have gone to the moon.

I think I could really go for a sabbatical. There's so much reading, thinking and writing I'd like to do about these changes. Take advertising for example.

TV ads in the 50's, 60's, and even into the 70's and 80's were on the Big Three networks. If you wanted to reach people, you advertised during Ed Sullivan and you could probably count on most of America seeing your message. It was like the Superbowl five nights a week.

Not anymore.

I think I may have just re-locked my unlocked iPhone. Not sure why, but it's not recognizing my T-Mobile SIM card. It's like it wants a SIM card from AT&T or something. Fat chance, iPhone. I love you, but I'll throw you to the wolves (or in the junk drawer) before I switch to AT&T. And don't give me that attitude. I'll wipe your pretty little self so clean there won't be an original 1 or 0 on you. Think about it long and hard and we'll continue this discussion in the morning.

For those of you who are reading this and aren't inanimate objects, I hope you have a good weekend. Who knows? Maybe the next time we see each other I'll reintroduce you to my new iPhone.

The Bun is...

... still a mystery. They weren't able to determine the gender. Little The Bun was stubbornly curled up in a ball and wouldn't uncurl for anything.

I think I'm having a girl.

Boy or girl? Vote now.

Friday is the day we go in for the ultrasound and (hopefully) find out whether we're having a boy or a girl. I've already voiced my concerns about having a girl, but here's a quick list of the benefits to each gender as I see them:

BENEFITS TO HAVING A GIRL

• We'll have our bases covered - at least one of each
  
• I'd absolutely melt if I had a little girl
• Could bring balance to the testosterone that would be flowing through our household in the form of trucks, video games, dirt, etc. (This could also be a con.)
• If my sons are anything like me, the changes of accidents and serious injury are greatly reduced if it's a girl
  

BENEFITS TO HAVING A BOY

• It would be awesome for Jake to have a brother
• I can call them "my boys"
• My wife can call the three of us "her boys"
  
• Seasonally, Jake's clothes will match perfectly with what The Bun II will need and we'll save a small fortune on clothes that will only be worn maybe four or five times before they're outgrown
• No frilly stuff

What do you think we're having? Please vote on the poll that's in the upper-right corner of the site. Also, do you see any other pros or cons to having a boy or a girl? Leave word in the comments.

Image courtesy of here.

Advice on being a Secret Santa

If at all possible, avoid routes to the front porch that are covered in crunchy snow and ice. Also, the fewer people making the trek to the porch, the better - I recommend less than three. Try to avoid paths to the door that may be more complicated than necessary. For example, if there is a 30 foot wooden ramp with a 90 degree turn in it that you must go up before even getting to the porch, consider aborting the mission and giving the toys to the neighbors. Or keep them for yourself.

Finally, if you've been volunteered by your commrades to be the one to stay and ring the bell (similar to being the wounded guy in a movie who stays behind to be eaten by the monster in the hopes it will buy his friends enough time to escape), and the porch light turns on before you get a chance to ring the bell, feel free to make as much noise as you want as you book it out of there as fast as you can. It doesn't matter if they hear you; In a matter of seconds they're going to open the door, see the presents, and know someone was there, which is the whole point anyway, right?

Image courtesy of here.

Intolerance for tolerance (reblogged)

*Note: I don't know if "reblogged" is the correct term for republishing/linking someone's content because you want it to have a larger audience. But people "retweet" all the time on Twitter, so I figure it's as good a term as any. So... a quote from the blog Political Shorts.

Here are some comments from a gay activist website. Remember, these are from the people that are angry because other people are intolerant.

• Can someone in CA please go burn down the Mormon temples there, PLEASE. I mean seriously. DO IT."
• "I'm going to give them something to be f--ing scared of....I'm a radical who is now on a mission to make them all pay for what they've done."
• "Burn their f--ing churches to the ground, and then tax the charred timbers."
• "I hope the No on 8 people have a long list and long knives."
• "I swear, I'd murder people with my bare hands this morning."
• "Trust me. I've got a big list of names of mormons and catholics [sic] that were big supporters of Prop 8....As far as mormons and catholics...I warn them to watch their backs."

Some additional points of my own, in addition to the obvious irony:

1. Why would you burn down our temples? Because you can't get married there? The only reason anyone would want to get married there is because they believe in the doctrine of the church. And if you do, then you A. understand why the church has taken the position it has and B. wouldn't want to burn down the temples.

2. As for the threats to individual members of the church - it's nothing new. I dare say that throughout the history of the United States, Mormons have been persecuted much more than homosexuals.

3. I'd love it if there were enough Mormons in California to take credit for the passage of Prop 8, but there were a lot of Catholics (as were mentioned), Baptists, and people of many other faiths and organizations who helped...but thanks for the nod anyway.

4. FYI - It doesn't matter how much you or anybody else protests; the church isn't going to budge. So if it makes you feel better to march around with your signs, be my guest - it's most certainly your right to do so - but it's not going to change anything.

Anyway, jump over and read the full post over at Political Shorts. I especially like his tip at the end about the Polynesian guy.

Sick

 The plagues of Egypt have hit our home (minus the locusts and rivers of blood). Hopefully everyone will be feeling better by Monday. Or, preferably, tomorrow.

Image courtesy of here.

Another Bun in the oven

Yup. We're expecting again. Due at the end of May.

P.S. No, I will not be putting the widget back up.

Why I didn't vote for Obama

Allow me to preface this post: this is going to be extremely personal and emotional. It will touch deeply on my personal beliefs as well as my political stance on some sensitive issues. While I will cite doctrine from my church, which I testify is true, the conclusions I come to about those doctrines are my own, not necessarily those of the Church.

"I don't want to vote for McCain and I won't vote for Obama." That's the little phrase I've come up with to explain my feelings about this election. I'm not happy with either candidate.

That being said, Obama is probably the walking definition of charismatic. When I've listened to some of his speeches I admit do feel inspired and feel like he would be an excellent leader. Despite these things, I still wouldn't vote for Obama. Here's why:

Obama supports not only abortion, but partial-birth abortion. In fact, he even made a speech in favor of post-birth "abortion". (You can read his full speech in chapter 10 of The Case Against Barack Obama by David Freddoso.)

Obama also wants to redefine the definition of marriage as between one man and one woman and voted against a federal amendment to ban same-sex marriage.

Now, one might ask why I put so much emphasis on these two topics when there are other very important things to consider including the war in Iraq, health care, energy issues, the economy, etc.. It's because of The Family: A Proclamation to the World which was given by God through his prophet. I hold it in the same reverence as I do the Bible, Book of Mormon, and other scripture.

In the Proclamation it states (in part - see the above link for the full document):

We, the First Presidency and the Council of the Twelve Apostles of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, solemnly proclaim that marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God and that the family is central to the Creator’s plan for the eternal destiny of His children....

We warn that the disintegration of the family will bring upon individuals, communities, and nations the calamities foretold by ancient and modern prophets.

We call upon responsible citizens and officers of government everywhere to promote those measures designed to maintain and strengthen the family as the fundamental unit of society.

Note that it doesn't say high taxes, outrageous government spending, wars, or lack of health care will bring upon us calamities. The disintegration of the family will. I don't consider those idle words, nor do I think they're figurative.

Which candidate "promotes [the] measures designed to maintain and strengthen the family as the fundamental unit of society"? It's not Obama. And while that's not the only factor to consider when casting your vote, I believe it's the most important.

Meat. Lots of meat.

I think this was the largest steak I'd ever seen. Supposedly, it was 18 oz (net weight before cooking). Ha. There's probably two pounds of meat there.

I was pleased with how much of it I ate.


That is all.

One of the more ghetto parade floats I've ever seen

Saw this beaut' while at the Labor Day parade in Evanston, Wyoming. Quality.

I need some suggestions (crowdsourcing Halloween)

OK. I do precious little around my house. Really, I come home from work, kiss my wife and son hello and then sit down and play Xbox until it's time to eat dinner. Then my wife does the dishes, I lock my son in his room and continue to play Xbox until it's time for his bedtime where I am interrupted again by having to kiss him goodnight.

So when you realize one of my few responsibilities is to be in charge of Jake's Halloween costume, you'd think I could handle it, right? Nope. I can't think of anything remotely interesting.

So I thought I'd ask everyone what they think my son should be for Halloween. Let me know in the comments. If I don't get any good suggestions it's probably going to end up similar to the above pictured costume which will scar my son for life.

Don't corrupt such an innocent mind. Leave a suggestion in the comments for a better Halloween costume.

Image grotesquely provided from here.

Generation gap

My parents watch 22 minutes of the evening news to get to the weather forecast.

I open my laptop and hit "F12".

Just an observation.

Do not disturb

On vacation (see above).

Image courtesy of here.